Confession Time. What could be worse than the cone of shame?

I have been pretty silent this month, with Christmas coming it just seems like I have been so busy getting ready for it.  I though today would be a good day to come clean on a few things. I have been in a state of denial for about a month.  About what?  Let's talk about easier subjects first.

• I have a love hate with avocados.  I really love to eat them, but I hate what a little window they have to get them ate.  One minute they are hard as a rock and the next thing you know you should have ate it yesterday. 
• I really wish I could be better about Paleo eating. I really felt good when I did a month of Paleo last January. I lost a couple pounds, I remember never feeling all bloated, but I hated the lack of energy on runs over 4 miles and I really like sugar and carbs.  Plus with kids and a husband who like sugar and carbs, it makes it double hard. Face it I don't have a lot of willpower if it is in the house and looks good, I want to eat it.
• Sometimes even though I know I shouldn't I microwave my food in a plastic container. I am just too lazy too move it to a different bowl.  I have started to buy more glass storage containers to help with this, but they are pricier so it will be awhile before I have as many as I want.
• I had some labs drawn recently and my vitamin D levels are low.  Normal values are 30-100ng/ml and I was 26.   A level of 10-29 suggests insufficiency and may lead to hyperparathyroidism and/or reduced muscle strength. Since it is winter and cold and not very sunny I guess I had better start supplementing with some D.

okay and here comes the worst one. 

• I have only run outside 2 times in December. I have tried my best to ignore it, but I have some sort of injury in my right leg, AGAIN.  still.  It felt so good after I got recovered from my October foot injury.  I think I overdid it.  I just wanted so desperately to be "me" again.  Running strong, running long, running hard, working out hard.  nope.  injured.  Pretty sure it is soft tissue and not a stress fracture so that at least is good.

I caved in this morning and admitted to myself what I am doing is not making it better. It is not getting.  I made an appointment with an ortho sports medicine guy for January 2.  I almost cried when they told me I could get in so soon.  I was expecting to wait weeks! 

I kind of had a hard time deciding which doctor to go with. I have worked with most these guys for 13. I work with them a lot, ortho is my specialty area and my love.   It feels weird to go and see a surgeon for this when I feel it is not surgical so I have to keep reminding myself they are also sports medicine doctors.

It feels weird to be a patient.  Oddly I worry about hurting someone's feelings. I don't want them to wonder why I didn't go to them and I am going to so and so instead. Probably silly to worry about.

Also.. I KNOW how much they hate working with runners.  Runners have 1 thing on their mind and most of their questions center around running.

• Can I keep running
• How soon can I start running
• When will I run normal again

so when I talked to the appointment gal I asked her who hated working with runners the least.  She laughed and assured me repeatedly they all liked working with runners.  I think she needs a little confession time here too.  I didn't tell her I work with these guys in surgery and have heard them complain about runners. 

I guess I could have confessed that.

I just really want some answers.  What's going on, what's wrong?  What can I do and what should I not do? How can I get better and stay better? I making it my resolution for 2014 to do whatever I need to do to get better.  

I recently saw a friend post on Facebook about how she was injured and she referred to being injured as the runner's cone of shame.

 I think being an injured runner and trying to ignore it hoping it will go away earns me the lizard of humiliation. 

from Google images

 Anyway Merry Christmas. 
Are you an injured runner? Feel free to vent!
Not an injured runner?  Confess something!